We found 50 results for your search.
**Drying Is Fun** ISDN 6-666-666666666-6666666666666666666 This book, by popular childrens’ author Spudchop Tagliatelle, is a must-have for parents of children suffering from post-shower-towelphobia. Witty and beautifully illustrated by popular childrens’ illustrator Robert Crowsfeet, it adopts a patronising tone that the children will mistake for sincerity, yet the parents will recognise as sharp piss-taking out of […]
There are a wealth of good reasons why I have not been around here much lately, and I really do owe you all an explanation. Once there was a farmer who worked the land. He had three sons, called Aaron, Bbron and Ccron. As he grew old, he decided that he would need to work […]
I received a lot of feedback to the CheeseOnToast++, and most people said “Wow. You must be the most goddamn sexy shark ever to grace the Internet!” And to those people, my devoted fans, I send kisses and words of lust. I want to hump you all. Some other people said that I had managed […]
My sister is giving me the cold shoulder. I turned around and saw her holding my diary. I enquired as to whether she had been reading it. She threw it at me and told me to fuck off. She stormed out of the room. Yes, she is on the blob ((Yes, it’s not the most […]
With ten minutes until 9am, I pulled up to the front of the supermarket looking for a quick operation. In, grab breakfast, out. No fuss. All four parent-and-child spaces were vacant – the whole car park, in fact, was reasonably quiet. So I flicked the steering wheel to the left, grabbed the handbrake, and executed […]
> Dear Donkey, > The new(ish) swearing function has finally destroyed my already fragile ego, thus sending me into a tragic spiral of self-loathing despair. > While I’m lost in the depths of my own neurosis, do you have a map of the mind’s nether regions that I can borrow? Donkey says: You can borrow […]
I don’t consider myself to be worldly-wise. I haven’t seen the world. Yet. I haven’t travelled all over, and experienced the diversity that only a true ramblin’ man could. But I think I’ve had first hand experience of some quite varied environments within the United Kingdom. I’ve lived in cities, and I’ve lived in villages, […]
I went out for a couple of drinkywoodles to a rather amusing establishment last night. Actually, the word “amusing” gives completely the wrong impression. I shall try again. Last night was a Tuesday. In the process of meeting up with a couple of friends for some post-laptop-auditing drinkywoodles, it was necessary to join them in […]
[Continues from here][] [continues from here]: http://pete.nu/blog/2002/10/how-to-paint-a-bit-of-a-car-part-1/ This is gonna be such fun. Firstly, admire your handiwork from yesterday. Marvel at the way that a day of rest has transformed it, from a painted piece of plastic into a piece of plastic which looks like it was always that colour. Set up your environment as […]
So the night started with my guitarist and myself compiling a cassette of our current demos for an old friend, which got us listening to some of our old material and musing over how good the old times were. Then, at five minutes to 10pm we decided that our bag of Doritos needed accompaniment, in […]